


Lecherous Limericks from Thedas

by Ammocharis



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Gen, Limericks, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-26
Updated: 2021-02-26
Packaged: 2021-03-17 14:40:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29718705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ammocharis/pseuds/Ammocharis
Summary: A collection of limericks of dubious quality dedicated to various characters from Thedas.Old woman named Wynne was quite wrinklyOn her face, her neck, and left pinkyAn elf once looked at her chestAnd shouted in glee: “I’ve been blessed!”Some say in her youth she was kinkyChapter 1: Wynne, Zevran, Shale/Sten, Jowan/Lily, Leliana, Flemeth, The Dog
Comments: 6
Kudos: 3





	Lecherous Limericks from Thedas

**Bar-crossed lovers**

There once was Jowan: The Blood Mage  
Who tripped and fell in a cage  
His girl named Lily  
Was rather silly  
Thinking they would get engaged

**Eye-candy for tearful assassins**

Old woman named Wynne was quite wrinkly  
On her face, her neck, and left pinky  
An elf once looked at her chest  
And shouted in glee: “I’ve been blessed!”  
Some say in her youth she was kinky

**Pigeon-holing**

“Sedimentary rock made from clay”  
That’s how some would describe Shale  
She’s much more than this, however  
She’s strong, she’s witty, she’s clever  
Say bye to your pigeons and mail

**Remarkable construct**

A golem has met a Qunari  
And learned about Koslun Ashkaari  
Sten’s muscles looked so alluring  
The dwarf in Shale started drooling  
Can golems become Viddathari?

**Red is a beautiful colour**

Crazy lay sister with cravings for blood?  
Or singer as pretty as rose flower bud?  
Both may be true, or both may be false  
Depends if you’re looking from far or up close  
(But don’t get too close - you’re gonna get stabbed)

**Dances with Dragons**

The Witch of the Wilds had a mother  
With upbringing skills like no other  
Don’t cross her way or she’ll slap you  
That’s how you tell demons from this shrew  
If she looks like a dragon - take cover

**How to use a murderknife**

Zevran, Zevran, what a prick  
I will show him just one trick  
See this blade?  
I’d like to trade  
Let’s see if it’s sharp real quick

**The Dog who defeated the Blight**

The bestest boy of the best  
Helped with the Warden’s quest  
He dug up some gifts  
Got rid of the stiffs  
Could solo Archdemon if pressed

After the Blight has ended  
He found his quest extended  
To many frisky hook-ups  
That produced many best-pups  
The world shall be defended

**Author's Note:**

> I've also got a [Tumblr sideblog](http://lecherous-limericks-from-thedas.tumblr.com/) for sharing these limericks.


End file.
